Cite tiny details or "golden phrases" from the text that were used to determine the ANSWER. Explain how your logic moved from the TEXT to your ANSWER.
Sample #1:
Question: Compare and contrast Chinua Achebe’s ideals with those of the narrator in Heart of Darkness. Student Answer: Chinua Achebe and the narrator in Heart of Darknessbothdiscuss native Africans but from polar opposite viewpoints. Marlow, the narrator in Heart of Darkness, felt that Europeans were the ideal race and that the natives could never be sophisticated like Europeans. In contrast, Chinua Achebe felt that the native Africans were ideal just the way they were. Achebe detested the European missionaries who attempted to change the way of thinking of native Africans. Both Chinua Achebe and Marlow considered their race to be ideal.
Utilizes solid word choice without sounding too fancy or too simple. (WORD CHOICE)
Show the personality of the student writer. (VOICE)
Uses transition words: "In contrast," "but from polar opposite viewpoints, "and "both".
Shows connecting topic and conclusion sentences without using the exact wording. (WORD CHOICE & ORG)
To Improve Sample #1:
Prove it: Find "golden nuggets" of word choice from Heart of Darkness that demonstrates the idea that Marlow thought Europeans were the ideal race.
Prove it: Find "golden nuggets" of word choice from Chinua Achebe's writing that demonstrates the idea that he felkt that native Africans were fine the way they were.
Sample #2:
Question: Describe the relationship between George and Lennie.
Student Answer: The relationship between George and Lennie is like a parent with a kid. The author portrays George as a parent figure by always making sure to keep Lennie out of trouble. In the book it states "Lennie's closed hand slowly obeyed. George took the mouse and threw it across the pool to the other side, among the brush." George is acting like a parent in this statement by not letting Lennie carry a dead mouse to pet.
Assets of Sample #2:
Follows ACE (above). (ORGANIZATION & IDEAS)
Introduces appropriate quote by saying, "In the book it states." (IDEAS)
Use of the word "portrays." (WORD CHOICE)
Answers question directly and clearly in first sentence. (IDEAS AND ORG)
To Improve Sample #2:
Replace the word "parent" with synonyms to avoid overusing the word. (WORD CHOICE)
Insert a comma after the phrase, "in the book." This is an introductory phrase that is shouting loudly that there will be a quote coming up. Introductory phrases need commas after them. (CONVENTIONS)
Explain the parental logic that George was probably thinking about why Lennie should not be carrying around a dead mouse. (IDEAS)
Add in some transitional words or phrases when adding another sentence or two that explains your logical progression. Example: In the event that the mouse has a disease, George does not want Lennie to be sick. With this intention, he has to watch Lennie carefully and correct him like a father would.
*Avoid having a quotation standing alone as a complete sentence, or, worse, as an incomplete sentence, in your writing. The quotation will seem disconnected from your own thoughts and from the flow of your sentences.
Four ways to integrate quotations.
1. Introduce the quotation with a complete sentence and a colon.
Example: In "Where I Lived, and What I Lived For," Thoreau states directly his purpose for going into the woods: "I went to the woods because I wished to live deliberately, to front only the essential facts of life, and see if I could not learn what it had to teach, and not, when I came to die, discover that I had not lived."
Example: Thoreau's philosophy might be summed up best by his repeated request for people to ignore the insignificant details of life: "Our life is frittered away by detail. An honest man has hardly need to count more than his ten fingers, or in extreme cases he may add his ten toes, and lump the rest. Simplicity, simplicity, simplicity!"
Example: Thoreau ends his essay with a metaphor: "Time is but the stream I go a-fishing in."
***Rule: if you use a complete sentence to introduce a quotation, you need a colon after the sentence.
2. Use an introductory phrase but NOT a complete sentence, separating the quotation with a comma.
Example: In "Where I Lived, and What I Lived For," Thoreau states directly his purpose for going into the woods when he says, "I went to the woods because I wished to live deliberately, to front only the essential facts of life, and see if I could not learn what it had to teach, and not, when I came to die, discover that I had not lived."
Example: Thoreau suggests the consequences of making ourselves slaves to progress when he says, "We do not ride on the railroad; it rides upon us."
Example: Thoreau asks, "Why should we live with such hurry and waste of life?"
Example: According to Thoreau, "We do not ride on the railroad; it rides upon us."
Rule: Use a comma to separate your own words from the quotation when your introductory or explanatory phrase ends with a verb such as "says," "said," "thinks," "believes," "pondered," "recalls," "questions," and "asks" (and many more). You should also use a comma when you introduce a quotation with a phrase such as "According to Thoreau."
3. Make the quotation a part of your own sentence without any punctuation between your own words and the words you are quoting.
Example: In "Where I Lived, and What I Lived For," Thoreau states directly his purpose for going into the woods when he says that "I went to the woods because I wished to live deliberately, to front only the essential facts of life, and see if I could not learn what it had to teach, and not, when I came to die, discover that I had not lived."
Example: Thoreau suggests the consequences of making ourselves slaves to progress when he says that "We do not ride on the railroad; it rides upon us."
Example: Thoreau argues that "shams and delusions are esteemed for soundest truths, while reality is fabulous."
Example: According to Thoreau, people are too often "thrown off the track by every nutshell and mosquito's wing that falls on the rails."
Notice that the word "that" is used in three of the examples above, and when it is used as it is in the examples, "that" replaces the comma which would be necessary without "that" in the sentence. You usually have a choice, then, when you begin a sentence with a phrase such as "Thoreau says." You either can add a comma after "says" (Thoreau says, "quotation") or you can add the word "that" with no comma (Thoreau says that "quotation.")
4. Use short quotations--only a few words--as part of your own sentence.
Example: In "Where I Lived, and What I Lived For," Thoreau states that his retreat to the woods around Walden Pond was motivated by his desire "to live deliberately" and to face only "the essential facts of life."
Example: Thoreau argues that people blindly accept "shams and delusions" as the "soundest truths," while regarding reality as "fabulous."
Example: Although Thoreau "drink[s] at" the stream of Time, he can "detect how shallow it is."
When you integrate quotations in this way, you do not use any special punctuation. Instead, you should punctuate the sentence just as you would if all of the words were your own. No punctuation is needed in the sentences above in part because the sentences do not follow the pattern explained under number 1 and 2 above: there is not a complete sentence in front of the quotations, and a word such as "says," "said," or "asks" does not appear directly in front of the quoted words.
All of the methods above for integrating quotations are correct, but you should avoid relying too much on just one method. You should instead use a variety of methods.
Notice the Punctuation!
Notice that there are only two punctuation marks that are used to introduce quotations: the comma and the colon (:). Note that a semicolon (;) is not used to introduce quotations.
Notice as well the punctuation of the sentences above in relation to the quotations. If there are no parenthetical citations in the sentences (no author's name and page number in parentheses), the commas and periods go inside the final quotation mark ("like this."). For whatever reason, this is the way we do it in America. In England, though, the commas and periods go outside of the final punctuation mark.
Semicolons and colons go outside of the final quotation mark ("like this";).
Question marks and exclamation points go outside of the final quotation mark if the punctuation mark is part of your sentence--your question or your exclamation ("like this"?). Those marks go inside of the final quotation mark if they are a part of the original--the writer's question or exclamation ("like this!").
Keep it Simple! The rules can be over-simplified like this:
Rule 1: Complete sentence: "quotation." (If you use a complete sentence to introduce a quotation, use a colon (:) just before the quotation.)
Rule 2: Someone says, "quotation." (If the word just before the quotation is a verb indicating someone uttering the quoted words, use a comma. Examples include the words "says," "said," "states," "asks," and "yells." But remember that there is no punctuation if the word "that" comes just before the quotation, as in "the narrator says that.")
Rule 3: If Rules 1 and 2 do not apply, do not use any punctuation between your words and the quoted words.